Perfectionism
Perfect is an idea. In the day to day real world, perfection really doesn’t exist. Perfectionism is an unrealistic standard, even with reasonable time and resources available, that is impossible to achieve. We will work today to change our thought processes. What is good enough? What are important tasks for your values? What do you see as the new perfect?
We defined perfection in an early blog entry as working to get things to the impossible level of perfect rather than getting things done or getting things done well enough. We must define well enough. Well enough is the standard when time, energy and money are brought into the focus. Only you will be able to tell the importance or relevance of a task in concordance with your values. Your coach can help you along the path but ultimately you must change your thinking to decide what is done and done well enough.
Let’s look at two examples of perfectionism at work and see if at the end of this posting we can achieve a change in our thought processes when looking at daunting tasks.
Example 1: Garage Scenario
A gorgeous fall weekend is coming up and you decide to tackle your garage. Your garage has been in disarray for over a year now. You can’t park your cars in the garage, let alone find anything in the chaos reigning in your garage. You have decided that you are going to take this Saturday to complete the project and have the perfect garage. As Saturday approaches, you are finding all kinds of reasons to procrastinate doing this project. Not because you are unable or unwilling, but because you have this idea of perfection and it’s daunting when you look at a year’s worth of items in the garage. As you complain to your coach, he asks you, what happens if it’s not perfect? Nothing. What happens if you only make a dent in the project this weekend? Nothing. So what if we change your goals. What if you work for 15 minutes a day for the next two weeks tackling one portion of the garage at a time? You start in the left corner and set a timer for 15 minutes. When your time is up, you are done for the day. I bet in one week you will see a difference.
Example 2: Resume Scenario
You are looking for a new job. The thought of composing your resume makes you shake and break out in a sweat. You feel you need to be perfect on paper so you can get the job. You continually put off compiling your resume facts because you are so distraught about being perfect. As you talk with your coach about this, he says let’s just brainstorm and write down the facts. Dates and companies you worked for in the past five years. In 20 minutes you have the beginning of your resume. Now a resume needs to be as close to perfect as you can get so you will need to spend some time on this project. All grammatical and spelling must be perfect to ensure you aren’t passed over because of a minor error. Your coach suggests you spend about two hours per day on this project and get some outside perspectives to ensure you are driving down the correct path. This will be a few week process.
Looking at both these scenarios, we see both extremes. Good enough for the garage may be incremental improvements however good enough for a resume is the error free target of perfectionism. Resume perfectionism is expected and needed in the world of business but in the garage example it is your level of perfectionism that counts. For most people getting the job they desire or need is more important than a clean garage, therefore rates higher in the energy and resources needed to complete.
So in essence, you are in charge of changing your thought processes. When you are in the midst of feeling perfectionism coming on, you can do an experiment. Notice the task you at hand and think of the resources you will need to achieve perfection at this task. Now think about your values and rank where this task falls in your values scale. Are you balancing your resources (time, energy and money) on the right tasks in line with your values? Remember in this juggling act there isn’t a “norm” or “perfect” balance for everyone. It all depends upon your values and resource allotment.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
We live in a world where information is vast and often may seem infinite. The challenge is how to find it when you need it and how to organize it so you can retrieve it quickly and easily when you need it. You can download, upload, share or create anything. The question is do you know how to retrieve this information quickly and when you need it?
There are two basic forms of information, hard copy and soft copy. Hard copy is the information that is physically in hand; magazine articles, print outs, presentations etc. Soft copy is the information that is digital; shared files, internet etc. We must work to find a filing system that will help you to sort information in both forms. It can make things a lot simpler and easier if you use the same large categories, systems and strategies for both your hard copy filing systems and your hard copy filing systems.
We have found the easiest way is start with major categories and then introduce minor categories. For instance the broad categories could be Administration, Operations, Marketing and Finance/Accounting. Now depending on where you are in life, your minor categories could vary.
· Administration- organizational aspects
· Operations-scheduling and deadline aspects
· Marketing –promoting yourself or your business
· Finance/Accounting – tracking of money
There are two key elements to your filing system; using the same categories and visual stimulation system throughout both your hard copy and digital filing systems. We recommend color coding for each of the categories; administration in blue, operations in yellow, marketing in red and finance in green. Every subcategory is put in a folder of that same color. You can even color code your file folders online by changing the font color to match. This way you are always working with the same colors and categories. The set up may be time extensive so you may want to employ a friend or coach to help you get started with this process.
Once you get started with the filing system that works for you, you will be encouraged by the time and energy you save when locating information.
There are two basic forms of information, hard copy and soft copy. Hard copy is the information that is physically in hand; magazine articles, print outs, presentations etc. Soft copy is the information that is digital; shared files, internet etc. We must work to find a filing system that will help you to sort information in both forms. It can make things a lot simpler and easier if you use the same large categories, systems and strategies for both your hard copy filing systems and your hard copy filing systems.
We have found the easiest way is start with major categories and then introduce minor categories. For instance the broad categories could be Administration, Operations, Marketing and Finance/Accounting. Now depending on where you are in life, your minor categories could vary.
| Life Situation | Administration | Operations | Marketing | Finance/Accounting |
| Home | Home insurance, warranties, household goods | Maintenance schedules for home and car, family member schedules, shopping lists | Resumes, Employment information, Life Purpose/Mission | Taxes, Licenses, Bills |
| Business | Office Equipment, Office Management | Forms and Policies, Structures and Procedures, Deadlines | Advertising, Web 2.0 | Budgets, P&L, Bills |
| School | Clubs, Sports, Sororities, Hobbies, Contact Lists | Class schedules, Exam dates, d/w/m schedules | Transcripts, Portfolio, Job Applications, Resumes, Career Coaches, Networking | Parking Permits, Student Loans, Grants, Banking information, Bill |
· Administration- organizational aspects
· Operations-scheduling and deadline aspects
· Marketing –promoting yourself or your business
· Finance/Accounting – tracking of money
There are two key elements to your filing system; using the same categories and visual stimulation system throughout both your hard copy and digital filing systems. We recommend color coding for each of the categories; administration in blue, operations in yellow, marketing in red and finance in green. Every subcategory is put in a folder of that same color. You can even color code your file folders online by changing the font color to match. This way you are always working with the same colors and categories. The set up may be time extensive so you may want to employ a friend or coach to help you get started with this process.
Once you get started with the filing system that works for you, you will be encouraged by the time and energy you save when locating information.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Managing Stuff Challenges of ADD and ADHD
The accumulation of stuff happens like breathing. As we live, stuff seems to accumulate in our offices, homes, dorm rooms and we have the daunting task of figuring out what to do with all this stuff. We have papers, pens, folders, magazines, books, tests, notes, quizzes, contacts; and the list goes on and on.
It is common to have a filing system in place for about 80% of all this stuff where we are likely to remember where it is and have an easy time of retrieving this information. It is the last 20% that often bog us down and distract us from the tasks at hand. Often it is nice to have a trusted person or coach, who will help with this part of the process. This unbiased outside opinion can help with deciphering your needs and thought processes.
We have found many methods that work in filing systems from index filing and labeling to color coding. In my experience I have found that I utilize a few techniques to maintain my filing systems. First I have a color coding system where red is for clients, yellow is for office stuff, blue is for household stuff and so forth. I have typed a list for the outside of the filing cabinets that is also color coded and lists the file names. This way we can quickly scan the lists to see what file drawer we need to go into for the information needed. Also with the color coding on the lists, it is a subtle reminder for our filing system and the colors used.
This system has worked well however I am constantly tweakin g the system and moving items to where they are more efficiently found. For example, all electronics come with a disc and an owner’s manual. There are three files that these would fall under; electronics, office and household goods. Originally we put these items in the household goods file folder. As we needed the information, we found that we were looking in the electronics folder first so we moved the information. Now we find our information in the first folder making our search much more efficient.
The final responsibility of the trusted person/coach is to ensure that we aren’t keeping items that are unnecessary and bogging down our lives. This person needs to understand your threshold for change and discarding items prior to making recommendations. Some coaches would be able to assist with this process.
To set up this system make take some initial investment of time and money however in the long run you will save time and money through efficiency of finding needed information. The accumulation of stuff happens like breathing. As we live, stuff seems to accumulate in our offices, homes, dorm rooms and we have the daunting task of figuring out what to do with all this stuff. We have papers, pens, folders, magazines, books, tests, notes, quizzes, contacts; and the list goes on and on.
It is common to have a filing system in place for about 80% of all this stuff where we are likely to remember where it is and have an easy time of retrieving this information. It is the last 20% that often bog us down and distract us from the tasks at hand. Often it is nice to have a trusted person or coach, who will help with this part of the process. This unbiased outside opinion can help with deciphering your needs and thought processes.
We have found many methods that work in filing systems from index filing and labeling to color coding. In my experience I have found that I utilize a few techniques to maintain my filing systems. First I have a color coding system where red is for clients, yellow is for office stuff, blue is for household stuff and so forth. I have typed a list for the outside of the filing cabinets that is also color coded and lists the file names. This way we can quickly scan the lists to see what file drawer we need to go into for the information needed. Also with the color coding on the lists, it is a subtle reminder for our filing system and the colors used.
This system has worked well however I am constantly tweakin g the system and moving items to where they are more efficiently found. For example, all electronics come with a disc and an owner’s manual. There are three files that these would fall under; electronics, office and household goods. Originally we put these items in the household goods file folder. As we needed the information, we found that we were looking in the electronics folder first so we moved the information. Now we find our information in the first folder making our search much more efficient.
The final responsibility of the trusted person/coach is to ensure that we aren’t keeping items that are unnecessary and bogging down our lives. This person needs to understand your threshold for change and discarding items prior to making recommendations. Some coaches would be able to assist with this process.
To set up this system make take some initial investment of time and money however in the long run you will save time and money through efficiency of finding needed information. The accumulation of stuff happens like breathing. As we live, stuff seems to accumulate in our offices, homes, dorm rooms and we have the daunting task of figuring out what to do with all this stuff. We have papers, pens, folders, magazines, books, tests, notes, quizzes, contacts; and the list goes on and on.
Friday, May 8, 2009
Common Challenge # 5 - Project Completion
Common Challenge #5 – Project Completion
Let’s go on an interactive journey together. You will need to have a few pieces of paper, a couple of writing instruments preferably in different colors and time to think about projects. Let’s talk completing a project.
We have all completed projects. Projects come in all shapes and sizes; from cleaning your room to presenting your idea in a board meeting. Now bring to mind your most recent completed project, using a different color writing instrument answer each of these sections of questions regarding this project.
As you recreate your processes, notice what type of encouragement you received along the way. Did your friends and family keep you going through process? Was it co-workers or mentors that encouraged you? Did you encourage yourself?
Now let’s notice the work space where you completed your project. Was it clean and tidy? Was it small or large? Did you have all the tools to complete your project within a place that made sense to you?
Lastly let’s notice the time constraints it took to complete your project. Did you set aside 15 minute intervals? Did you spend one full weekend completing the task? Did you set up meetings with others to work on certain aspects of the project? Did you record the project in your day planner?
Once you have looked at your answers, you can start to determine your work habits. Every single person is different in how they will succeed in completing a project. Take a moment and re-read how you successfully have worked in the past. One of the keys to success is to create the atmosphere where you will succeed.
Let’s look at our Big Goal study from April 24th entry on Challenge #3. The goal was “I want to read for an hour a day for five (5) days per week starting tomorrow and continuing for three months.” We didn’t look at our previous habits. Now, we should define the work space and how to stay encouraged along the way. Where will the reading be done? Is it the library at a desk or in a comfy chair with hot tea? Can you read sitting upright or do you need to be more relaxed to absorb what you are reading? Let’s suppose from the exercise above you determined that you need a quiet place with no distractions so you set up a nice chair in a corner of your home to read for your one hour.
Also from the above exercise, you may have determined that you need to have a weekly check up on your progress but this person needs to be impartial to you. To complete your big goal, you decide you need to hire a coach for a weekly check up and assessment of the goal. Your coach will encourage you through the process and help you reassess your progress on the project. This will help to keep you accountable to completing the project on time. Now, you have the analysis to create an atmosphere that will encourage success on your projects in the future. You have evaluated what makes for a successful completion of a project and know how to attain the correct tricks and tools to aide you along the path.
Let’s go on an interactive journey together. You will need to have a few pieces of paper, a couple of writing instruments preferably in different colors and time to think about projects. Let’s talk completing a project.
We have all completed projects. Projects come in all shapes and sizes; from cleaning your room to presenting your idea in a board meeting. Now bring to mind your most recent completed project, using a different color writing instrument answer each of these sections of questions regarding this project.
As you recreate your processes, notice what type of encouragement you received along the way. Did your friends and family keep you going through process? Was it co-workers or mentors that encouraged you? Did you encourage yourself?
Now let’s notice the work space where you completed your project. Was it clean and tidy? Was it small or large? Did you have all the tools to complete your project within a place that made sense to you?
Lastly let’s notice the time constraints it took to complete your project. Did you set aside 15 minute intervals? Did you spend one full weekend completing the task? Did you set up meetings with others to work on certain aspects of the project? Did you record the project in your day planner?
Once you have looked at your answers, you can start to determine your work habits. Every single person is different in how they will succeed in completing a project. Take a moment and re-read how you successfully have worked in the past. One of the keys to success is to create the atmosphere where you will succeed.
Let’s look at our Big Goal study from April 24th entry on Challenge #3. The goal was “I want to read for an hour a day for five (5) days per week starting tomorrow and continuing for three months.” We didn’t look at our previous habits. Now, we should define the work space and how to stay encouraged along the way. Where will the reading be done? Is it the library at a desk or in a comfy chair with hot tea? Can you read sitting upright or do you need to be more relaxed to absorb what you are reading? Let’s suppose from the exercise above you determined that you need a quiet place with no distractions so you set up a nice chair in a corner of your home to read for your one hour.
Also from the above exercise, you may have determined that you need to have a weekly check up on your progress but this person needs to be impartial to you. To complete your big goal, you decide you need to hire a coach for a weekly check up and assessment of the goal. Your coach will encourage you through the process and help you reassess your progress on the project. This will help to keep you accountable to completing the project on time. Now, you have the analysis to create an atmosphere that will encourage success on your projects in the future. You have evaluated what makes for a successful completion of a project and know how to attain the correct tricks and tools to aide you along the path.
Friday, May 1, 2009
Time Planning and Management
Time is elusive and if you have ADD tendencies, you may find many miscommunications relating back to time management. Everything from over committing to remembering is a challenge for those with ADD/ADHD. Sometimes deadlines are missed, co workers or friends are disappointed and we tend to get down on ourselves if we can’t find a fix for time management.
Through my coaching career, I have found that taking the time to find the correct time management plan is worth the effort. There is a myriad of planners to choose from and it all comes down to what will work for you. As you are shopping, look at color, style, pattern, size. You may ask; do I plan daily, weekly or monthly? You may ask, are the appointment spaces large enough to write in? Do I want to type and use a virtual calendar? Does anyone else need to have access to my calendar? Essentially what you are doing is trying to strike a balance between ease and effectiveness of your day planner.
Once you have determined what will work best for you. The work begins; the allotment of time or time management. Every day has a finite amount of time and every person has, what seems like, an infinite amount of tasks to complete. Do you ever feel like your “to do” list never ends?
Your day planner will help you organize your tasks so that all the balls you are throwing in the air are completed. Think of your day planner as your safety net for life, it will catch the balls you are throwing so that none land on the ground. As tasks begin to come in, you and your coach will analyze the deadline, the time needed to complete the task and the time you have available to do this. Sometimes you may find that you need to allot more time on either side of a project for unexpected interruptions in your day. You will record your time in your day planner. As you get more comfortable with your planner, you will be able to do this analysis yourself and continually, throughout the day, place tasks in specific appointment times. This technique will help you to meet your deadlines and keep yourself from over committing. It will force you to make choices about what is most important on a daily basis. Because of the finite number of hours available, one must choose what is most important for us to spend our time on. Finally the action of recording tasks on the calendar will help you to remember your projects.
At the end of each week, you and your coach will be able to track what is important to you and what is continually moving. You will have the tools necessary to figure out what needs delegation and what you have passion to complete.
Ultimately, you will be completing projects by their deadlines and have time to allocate to what truly inspires you. A key to time management is assigning a day and time to do everything instead of having the never ending to do list.
Through my coaching career, I have found that taking the time to find the correct time management plan is worth the effort. There is a myriad of planners to choose from and it all comes down to what will work for you. As you are shopping, look at color, style, pattern, size. You may ask; do I plan daily, weekly or monthly? You may ask, are the appointment spaces large enough to write in? Do I want to type and use a virtual calendar? Does anyone else need to have access to my calendar? Essentially what you are doing is trying to strike a balance between ease and effectiveness of your day planner.
Once you have determined what will work best for you. The work begins; the allotment of time or time management. Every day has a finite amount of time and every person has, what seems like, an infinite amount of tasks to complete. Do you ever feel like your “to do” list never ends?
Your day planner will help you organize your tasks so that all the balls you are throwing in the air are completed. Think of your day planner as your safety net for life, it will catch the balls you are throwing so that none land on the ground. As tasks begin to come in, you and your coach will analyze the deadline, the time needed to complete the task and the time you have available to do this. Sometimes you may find that you need to allot more time on either side of a project for unexpected interruptions in your day. You will record your time in your day planner. As you get more comfortable with your planner, you will be able to do this analysis yourself and continually, throughout the day, place tasks in specific appointment times. This technique will help you to meet your deadlines and keep yourself from over committing. It will force you to make choices about what is most important on a daily basis. Because of the finite number of hours available, one must choose what is most important for us to spend our time on. Finally the action of recording tasks on the calendar will help you to remember your projects.
At the end of each week, you and your coach will be able to track what is important to you and what is continually moving. You will have the tools necessary to figure out what needs delegation and what you have passion to complete.
Ultimately, you will be completing projects by their deadlines and have time to allocate to what truly inspires you. A key to time management is assigning a day and time to do everything instead of having the never ending to do list.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Values 3 The Big Goal
When talking about the Big Goal we must first define that goal. It is a dream or goal that feels big to the dreamer. Everything begins with a wish or dream and we turn it into a goal. There is an Art and Science to setting and achieving Big Goals.
First the Science, I like to use the S.M.A.R.T. Goal approach to turn your dreams into goals. S.M.A.R.T. is the foundation for goal setting in that it creates the steps you need to take to define and achieve your goals.
For example, let’s say that your big goal is to read more books. In this statement you have a dream. We want to turn this dream into a goal so we get more specific. I want to read for an hour a day for five (5) days per week. Now we need to exam this statement utilizing the S.M.A.R.T. goal setting technique. We made it specific. It’s measureable as one hour per day. We know others have done this so it is achievable. We know you can read so it is realistic. We need to set a time frame. Let’s say you want to do this for three months starting tomorrow. So we add that to the goal statement. I want to read for an hour a day for five (5) days per week starting tomorrow and continuing for three months. We have just defined our Big Goal.
Secondly, the Art portion is the achieving the Big Goal. The art is in the flexibility needed to achieve the goals when life happens. On a daily basis we must revise and evaluate how life’s interruptions are affecting our pursuit of the Big Goal. As part of the strategy to ensure success, we set the plan to achieve the goal and we set a backup plan. We also will set a strategy to keep the goal at the forefront of our thinking.
For example, using the statement above, we decided in week 1 of our test to read from 5 – 6 pm Monday – Friday as soon as we got home from work. If something comes up after work, then we will read from 10:30 – 11:30 before our normal bedtime of midnight. We put these time frames in our day planner so we are reminded of the goal. During the week we will notice how much we are reading, when and how focused we are during our sessions. We can record our thoughts in our daily planners. At the end of the week we will evaluate to see if adjustments need to be made to succeed in our goal.
We have a few steps to the Big Goal value; setting the goal, daily maintenance and noticing, evaluating the success and succeeding. The biggest secret in achieving a Big Goal is breaking it down into small parts, planning on, deciding and preparing for the work needed to succeed.
First the Science, I like to use the S.M.A.R.T. Goal approach to turn your dreams into goals. S.M.A.R.T. is the foundation for goal setting in that it creates the steps you need to take to define and achieve your goals.
S is for SPECIFIC. We turn your dream into a specific statement.
M is for MEASURABLE. The statement created must be measureable usually either in time or units
A is for ACHIEVABLE. The question to ask is have others achieved your statement or are they in process of achieving your statement.
R is for REALISTIC. With your life, do you have the time, energy and patience to complete the dream? Do you have the skills necessary or do we modify the statement to acquire the necessary skills?
T is for TIME. Set a specific time frame for accomplishing your goal. When do you want to reevaluate your goal statement?
For example, let’s say that your big goal is to read more books. In this statement you have a dream. We want to turn this dream into a goal so we get more specific. I want to read for an hour a day for five (5) days per week. Now we need to exam this statement utilizing the S.M.A.R.T. goal setting technique. We made it specific. It’s measureable as one hour per day. We know others have done this so it is achievable. We know you can read so it is realistic. We need to set a time frame. Let’s say you want to do this for three months starting tomorrow. So we add that to the goal statement. I want to read for an hour a day for five (5) days per week starting tomorrow and continuing for three months. We have just defined our Big Goal.
Secondly, the Art portion is the achieving the Big Goal. The art is in the flexibility needed to achieve the goals when life happens. On a daily basis we must revise and evaluate how life’s interruptions are affecting our pursuit of the Big Goal. As part of the strategy to ensure success, we set the plan to achieve the goal and we set a backup plan. We also will set a strategy to keep the goal at the forefront of our thinking.
For example, using the statement above, we decided in week 1 of our test to read from 5 – 6 pm Monday – Friday as soon as we got home from work. If something comes up after work, then we will read from 10:30 – 11:30 before our normal bedtime of midnight. We put these time frames in our day planner so we are reminded of the goal. During the week we will notice how much we are reading, when and how focused we are during our sessions. We can record our thoughts in our daily planners. At the end of the week we will evaluate to see if adjustments need to be made to succeed in our goal.
We have a few steps to the Big Goal value; setting the goal, daily maintenance and noticing, evaluating the success and succeeding. The biggest secret in achieving a Big Goal is breaking it down into small parts, planning on, deciding and preparing for the work needed to succeed.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Value #2 Inner Motivation
To understand Inner Motivation one should start by understanding the different types of motivations. The top five (5) motivations are:
Utilitarian – meaning one prefers some practical or useful results to come from ones efforts, time, energy or money. People with this value are results oriented sometimes towards money, more productivity or better health. When people with high Utilitarian value volunteer, they want to see practical results to their efforts.
Altruism – someone who values service to others to benefit a certain person, group of people or cause. People with Altruism value want to see that their efforts are used for the good of others.
Aesthetics - can be a beautiful architectural design, art in general or noticing beauty in simplicity of elegance. People with Ascetics high on their values list; see the beauty and interconnectedness to life and its rhythm. Remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder so for a mathematician this could be a theorem or equation while for an artist it could be colors and textures.
Tradition – value of families and connecting through families. This could be around holidays, religious tradition (ceremonies, holidays, and rites). Usually it is not related to liberal or conservative but more about continuity.
Theoretical – value of understanding how things work, why they are the way they are. Usually people with high theoretical follow science, chemistry, biology or religious activities understanding how and why life all fits together.
The next step is to understand how one ranks these values and how specifically they show up for you. Most people need to take an assessment to rank their values. This will help one to understand more deeply and quickly how they show up in your life. This assessment will help you to understand how to spend your time, energy and money to align with your values.
Utilitarian – meaning one prefers some practical or useful results to come from ones efforts, time, energy or money. People with this value are results oriented sometimes towards money, more productivity or better health. When people with high Utilitarian value volunteer, they want to see practical results to their efforts.
Altruism – someone who values service to others to benefit a certain person, group of people or cause. People with Altruism value want to see that their efforts are used for the good of others.
Aesthetics - can be a beautiful architectural design, art in general or noticing beauty in simplicity of elegance. People with Ascetics high on their values list; see the beauty and interconnectedness to life and its rhythm. Remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder so for a mathematician this could be a theorem or equation while for an artist it could be colors and textures.
Tradition – value of families and connecting through families. This could be around holidays, religious tradition (ceremonies, holidays, and rites). Usually it is not related to liberal or conservative but more about continuity.
Theoretical – value of understanding how things work, why they are the way they are. Usually people with high theoretical follow science, chemistry, biology or religious activities understanding how and why life all fits together.
The next step is to understand how one ranks these values and how specifically they show up for you. Most people need to take an assessment to rank their values. This will help one to understand more deeply and quickly how they show up in your life. This assessment will help you to understand how to spend your time, energy and money to align with your values.
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