Often with ADD/ADHD getting started can be the fun and easy part of completing projects, however, this is not always the case. Sometimes getting started is elusive and difficult. When it is time to start a project and you find that things are not going as you wish or things are not starting as easily as you wish, take a look at several elements:
1: Do you know what is to be done?
If not, who can help clarifiy what is to be done? How can you get clear on what is to be done?
2: After you know what is to be done, do you know how to get it done/how to do it?
If not, who can help clarify how to get started and get it done? How can you get clear on how to get it done?
3: Do you have the skills, tools. supplies, assistance or whatever is needed to get the project started and done?
If not, who can help clarify what skills, tools, supplies, assistance is needed? How can you get clear on what is needed?
4: Do you know "why" you are doing this project? Not everyone needs to know "why" but sometimes some people need to know the why, or the outcome or the goal....
If not, who can help clarify why this project is to be done? How can you get clear on why?
Experiement with different versions of these approaches and notice what works and what does not. If you need more support, find a friend, relative, or coach to help you get going and creating more success!
Coach Robb
Friday, October 17, 2008
Friday, September 12, 2008
Social Skills .. Your Communication Style
1 ) Get to know your natural communication style...what is your typical way of communication?
Part 2 of 2...
Are you more focused inwardly or outwardly...that is are you more of an introvert or extrovert?
Learn Your Style
Part 2 of 2...
Are you more focused inwardly or outwardly...that is are you more of an introvert or extrovert?
Learn Your Style
Friday, September 5, 2008
1 ) Get to know your natural communication style...what is your typical way of communication?
How is it that you approach task completion or problem solving?
Examples, are you more likely to focus on the people and relationships in order to get the tasks done and problems solved OR are you more likely to focus on the tasks or problems themself? (notice and learn)...
How is it that you approach task completion or problem solving?
Examples, are you more likely to focus on the people and relationships in order to get the tasks done and problems solved OR are you more likely to focus on the tasks or problems themself? (notice and learn)...
Friday, August 29, 2008
Social Skills
Some Key Elements to Social Skills Awareness:
1 ) Get to know your natural communication style...what is your typical way of communication?
2) Get to know the key elements of communication styles in general
3) Develop observational skills so that you notice the natural communication syles of those with whom you are communicating.
4) Develop the skills to be able to choose to adapt your communication style to compliment the styles and situations at hand for building rappore, understanding, and effectiveness.
More to follow...
Notice Now
1 ) Get to know your natural communication style...what is your typical way of communication?
2) Get to know the key elements of communication styles in general
3) Develop observational skills so that you notice the natural communication syles of those with whom you are communicating.
4) Develop the skills to be able to choose to adapt your communication style to compliment the styles and situations at hand for building rappore, understanding, and effectiveness.
More to follow...
Notice Now
Friday, August 22, 2008
Self Care...Creating and Mainting Your Focus
Focus
As you get the three parts of the Self Care systems more in to place (as mentioned in the 3 previous posts) they will all aid in creating and maintaining your focus. As you know, each of these areas help support and overlap with the other areas. Some strategies to remember and utilize in supporting your focus generally include…keeping the things you want to focus on during a particular time and while in a particular space (such as at your desk) may include making things highly visible. For example, drawings, photos or other items that help remind you what you want to be doing at a particular time may be useful. On the other hand, removing things that may distract you or tempt you from getting off your focus may be good to notice so that you can remove them from sight. For example, if you have your default home page or web browser set on a search engine or on your web mail page or some other place that may pull your attention, consider keeping your web browser closed and/or setting your screen saver to go to a blank or black page so there is no distraction. Rather than having your email program download your emails every 10 minutes, have them download your email once an hour or three times a day. If you have ongoing projects with which you are collaborating with others on, and you need to know when your team members send you information on your current projects of the day, perhaps you can create project subtitles so you may check for those emails every hour without getting sidetracked on someone else’s’ agenda.
Another strategy is as much as possible, do your reading/studying for work or school in the same location(s) each day…always use the same room at home or the same area at the library, for example. You may wish to use the same time of day for certain tasks…notice what parts of the day is best for your to read or study and what times you do best to do tasks that require more moving around. Be creative and know that you may do better to read while standing or to read for 15 minutes and take a 2 minute walk and come back to reading. Notice when and how you are at your best, and use the options available to you with that in mind.
Here is to more success,
Robb
As you get the three parts of the Self Care systems more in to place (as mentioned in the 3 previous posts) they will all aid in creating and maintaining your focus. As you know, each of these areas help support and overlap with the other areas. Some strategies to remember and utilize in supporting your focus generally include…keeping the things you want to focus on during a particular time and while in a particular space (such as at your desk) may include making things highly visible. For example, drawings, photos or other items that help remind you what you want to be doing at a particular time may be useful. On the other hand, removing things that may distract you or tempt you from getting off your focus may be good to notice so that you can remove them from sight. For example, if you have your default home page or web browser set on a search engine or on your web mail page or some other place that may pull your attention, consider keeping your web browser closed and/or setting your screen saver to go to a blank or black page so there is no distraction. Rather than having your email program download your emails every 10 minutes, have them download your email once an hour or three times a day. If you have ongoing projects with which you are collaborating with others on, and you need to know when your team members send you information on your current projects of the day, perhaps you can create project subtitles so you may check for those emails every hour without getting sidetracked on someone else’s’ agenda.
Another strategy is as much as possible, do your reading/studying for work or school in the same location(s) each day…always use the same room at home or the same area at the library, for example. You may wish to use the same time of day for certain tasks…notice what parts of the day is best for your to read or study and what times you do best to do tasks that require more moving around. Be creative and know that you may do better to read while standing or to read for 15 minutes and take a 2 minute walk and come back to reading. Notice when and how you are at your best, and use the options available to you with that in mind.
Here is to more success,
Robb
Friday, August 15, 2008
Self Care...Managing Information
Self Care…Managing Information…
There are a number of ways to start Managing Information in more effective ways. A part of the solution may be to further utilize your day planner. One thing is rather than making simple to do list, put each task in an actual time slot on your day planner. Make sure to allow time for and travel to or from, for gathering tools or information needed, for putting away tools and information and for leaving short notes as to what you have done and what the next steps are so when you come back to the task you can scan your notes and get up to speed quickly. Another way for managing information may be to set up hard copy files and electronic files so that they mirror each other. That is, use the same type of organizational structure (names, sub fields and so forth) so you can more quickly and easily navigate your files. Next, ask yourself what value or benefit you get for tracking and storing the information you have? Have you and are you getting value from tracking the storing the information? Is it worth the time, energy, money it has and is costing you? What if you let go of tracking or storing that piece or information? Could you quickly and easily find it on the Internet if needed?
Sometimes, paper systems are still best, when we consider the cost in money for electronic gadgets, software, set up time, system crashes, lost data…sometimes a paper rolodex may do the job better for us than an electronic solution. However, if you know technology and can quickly and easily trouble shoot any problems or you have someone who does that for you…you may prefer to go the electronic route. Just make sure you have the information you need to keep your life running and growing effectively …in the direction you wish.
To Your Success,
Robb
There are a number of ways to start Managing Information in more effective ways. A part of the solution may be to further utilize your day planner. One thing is rather than making simple to do list, put each task in an actual time slot on your day planner. Make sure to allow time for and travel to or from, for gathering tools or information needed, for putting away tools and information and for leaving short notes as to what you have done and what the next steps are so when you come back to the task you can scan your notes and get up to speed quickly. Another way for managing information may be to set up hard copy files and electronic files so that they mirror each other. That is, use the same type of organizational structure (names, sub fields and so forth) so you can more quickly and easily navigate your files. Next, ask yourself what value or benefit you get for tracking and storing the information you have? Have you and are you getting value from tracking the storing the information? Is it worth the time, energy, money it has and is costing you? What if you let go of tracking or storing that piece or information? Could you quickly and easily find it on the Internet if needed?
Sometimes, paper systems are still best, when we consider the cost in money for electronic gadgets, software, set up time, system crashes, lost data…sometimes a paper rolodex may do the job better for us than an electronic solution. However, if you know technology and can quickly and easily trouble shoot any problems or you have someone who does that for you…you may prefer to go the electronic route. Just make sure you have the information you need to keep your life running and growing effectively …in the direction you wish.
To Your Success,
Robb
Friday, August 8, 2008
Self Care -- Managing Things / Stuff
Continuing from the previous post…lets explore managing Things / Stuff.
Some first steps to managing Things / Stuff may be different. A great rule is a place for everything and everything in its place. Wherever you are, it generally is best to improve upon this goal in very small steps at a time. For example, rather that starting with an entire room, or if you have accumulated lots of stuff, rather than starting with your entire desk, perhaps start with a one inch stake from one of the piles on your desk. It is great to get support for these tasks. Sometimes just having someone who will be supportive and be there with you as you do all the work, is all you need to get started and to complete small steps at a time. Sometimes you need someone to talk out what you want to do and how you will do it. It is all fine if you want to get an ADD / ADHD Coach or an ADD / ADHD to actively help with the task. Do whatever you need to do to get started. If you schedule time to clear out some things and find after two attempts, you are not making progress, that is an indication that it is time for you to ask for support. It may be best to start small, yet start where there will be a big positive impact on your life right away…such things may include finding a place for items you use multiple times a day, so that you can immediately get benefit from your efforts. Leave organizing things that may be for reference or that you may use less than once a month for later after you get the things you use daily or weekly handled first. Remember, we are shooting for what works good enough, and we are not aiming for perfection.
Some first steps to managing Things / Stuff may be different. A great rule is a place for everything and everything in its place. Wherever you are, it generally is best to improve upon this goal in very small steps at a time. For example, rather that starting with an entire room, or if you have accumulated lots of stuff, rather than starting with your entire desk, perhaps start with a one inch stake from one of the piles on your desk. It is great to get support for these tasks. Sometimes just having someone who will be supportive and be there with you as you do all the work, is all you need to get started and to complete small steps at a time. Sometimes you need someone to talk out what you want to do and how you will do it. It is all fine if you want to get an ADD / ADHD Coach or an ADD / ADHD to actively help with the task. Do whatever you need to do to get started. If you schedule time to clear out some things and find after two attempts, you are not making progress, that is an indication that it is time for you to ask for support. It may be best to start small, yet start where there will be a big positive impact on your life right away…such things may include finding a place for items you use multiple times a day, so that you can immediately get benefit from your efforts. Leave organizing things that may be for reference or that you may use less than once a month for later after you get the things you use daily or weekly handled first. Remember, we are shooting for what works good enough, and we are not aiming for perfection.
Friday, August 1, 2008
What is Self Care...?
What is Self Care...? It is different things to different people. Self Care for those with ADD / ADHD would include things that may not be as important to those without those challenges.
Self Care for those with ADD / ADHD ought to include things to cover these categories:
Outside support and structure for managing:
Time
Information
Things/Stuff
Focus
It is often a good strategy to organize oneself and life in such a way that one can use outside things to track and handle time, information, things, and your focus; as much as possible. Using these strategies are not a sign of weakness rather they are a sign of working smart and strategically. Organizing one's life in this way allows one to focus more on what is most important and fun.
Time -- When it comes to managing time, there are some good places to start. One place is look for whatever routines one has in place and notice what is working for you and what is not working for you. Keep the ones that work, tweaking as needed, discard the others and replace them with new ones. For example, pick a sequence of tasks to do for getting ready for the day, pick an order for them, and stick with it. Do the same for getting ready for bed. If one's life and work allow, pick wake up times and bed times and stay with them. From there, build out to scheduling appointments, tasks and to do's. Depending on your life, habits and way of functioning, you may want to start out using a paper planner and plan out a day or week at a time. Select a time at the beginning of the day to review what is coming and some time at the end of the work day or evening to review the day you just had. I prefer to plan at least a day ahead at a minimum...even off days. I do best if ,at least, the day before I plan so when I wake the next day, a plan for work or fun is already in place. If I wake without a plan for a work day, I am typically disappointed at the end of the day in how I spent the day or in what I accomplished. If I awoke with a plan in place, I have a better chance of being more productive and feeling better about my day, at days end. Even if it is a play day, I often feel more satisfied at the end of the day, if it were a day that I had already planned at least the day before.
This month we will look at how to get started in the other categories of Self Care...Managing Stuff, Managing Information and Your Focus...
Self Care for those with ADD / ADHD ought to include things to cover these categories:
Outside support and structure for managing:
Time
Information
Things/Stuff
Focus
It is often a good strategy to organize oneself and life in such a way that one can use outside things to track and handle time, information, things, and your focus; as much as possible. Using these strategies are not a sign of weakness rather they are a sign of working smart and strategically. Organizing one's life in this way allows one to focus more on what is most important and fun.
Time -- When it comes to managing time, there are some good places to start. One place is look for whatever routines one has in place and notice what is working for you and what is not working for you. Keep the ones that work, tweaking as needed, discard the others and replace them with new ones. For example, pick a sequence of tasks to do for getting ready for the day, pick an order for them, and stick with it. Do the same for getting ready for bed. If one's life and work allow, pick wake up times and bed times and stay with them. From there, build out to scheduling appointments, tasks and to do's. Depending on your life, habits and way of functioning, you may want to start out using a paper planner and plan out a day or week at a time. Select a time at the beginning of the day to review what is coming and some time at the end of the work day or evening to review the day you just had. I prefer to plan at least a day ahead at a minimum...even off days. I do best if ,at least, the day before I plan so when I wake the next day, a plan for work or fun is already in place. If I wake without a plan for a work day, I am typically disappointed at the end of the day in how I spent the day or in what I accomplished. If I awoke with a plan in place, I have a better chance of being more productive and feeling better about my day, at days end. Even if it is a play day, I often feel more satisfied at the end of the day, if it were a day that I had already planned at least the day before.
This month we will look at how to get started in the other categories of Self Care...Managing Stuff, Managing Information and Your Focus...
Monday, July 28, 2008
Next Step
Someone I was working with today, discovered that the simple step of getting to bed by a certain time each night would enrich his life greatly, helping him be more alert and in a happier mood by having more rest and sleep. Sometimes, building the life full of more things you love and with less things that you would prefer to do without, requires some more self care. For bigger changes, sometimes extreme self care is in order. What is extreme self care? It will mean different things to different folks. For some, it may include eating the foods he knows is best for his focus, attention and energy, daily walks, getting to bed on time each night, going to the doctor and dentist every 3 to 6 months to make sure health is in or getting to tip top shape.
Whatever extreme self care means to you, providing it for yourself will typically support you to have the energy, will and motivation to follow through on the other life transformation and changes you are making now. Whatever changes you are making now, please do allow for time, energy and money for good self care. Keep your comments and questions coming.
To Your Continued Success....
Robb
Whatever extreme self care means to you, providing it for yourself will typically support you to have the energy, will and motivation to follow through on the other life transformation and changes you are making now. Whatever changes you are making now, please do allow for time, energy and money for good self care. Keep your comments and questions coming.
To Your Continued Success....
Robb
Monday, July 21, 2008
Strengths - Finding more time for enjoyment
So, what if you have been tracking the amount of time you spend on your Strengths and you find that there is a lot of room for improvement?
Well, you may wish to start with something that is the simplist and easiest for YOU to do. That is, pick one thing for work or school that you can easily add more time doing that is within the things you do well and enjoy doing and set a goal of spending one more hour a week doing that thing. On the other side, see if there is something you do not enjoy doing and see how you can spend 30 minutes less a week doing that (while still being effective in life). For example, could you pay someone else to do that thing, delegate it at work? What if you barter, you agree to do something for someone else who agrees to do that thing for you? Who knows, if you look closely, you may discover that you can get a system set up or automate a process so it no longer is something that you dislike so much, maybe with a system set up that works for you, it becomes something you do well and enjoy? Send your comments and discoveries to me...
Keep Creating a Better Life For Yourself, One Step at a Time...
Robb
Well, you may wish to start with something that is the simplist and easiest for YOU to do. That is, pick one thing for work or school that you can easily add more time doing that is within the things you do well and enjoy doing and set a goal of spending one more hour a week doing that thing. On the other side, see if there is something you do not enjoy doing and see how you can spend 30 minutes less a week doing that (while still being effective in life). For example, could you pay someone else to do that thing, delegate it at work? What if you barter, you agree to do something for someone else who agrees to do that thing for you? Who knows, if you look closely, you may discover that you can get a system set up or automate a process so it no longer is something that you dislike so much, maybe with a system set up that works for you, it becomes something you do well and enjoy? Send your comments and discoveries to me...
Keep Creating a Better Life For Yourself, One Step at a Time...
Robb
The Attention Deficit Disorder Association Conference in Minneapolis, Minnasota July 2008
Here are some summary points from some of my notes from participating in the conference:
Some important reminders that the speakers addressed at the conference included the importance to those with ADD/ADHD challenges (and others who share those challenges) to cover some basics:
Get and stay connected socially with those who love, support and accept you for who you are and who encourage and support you.
Get work where you feel productive and appreciated.
Have constant structured support to stay focused on short term and long term goals.
Use systems and technology to help you get and stay organized.
Bring and keep fun in your life and plan for and schedule fun and social time so you support yourself in having it.
Some new things:
Research shows that having a trained and specialized ADD/ADHD Coach in your life helps you feel happier, stay focused and be more productive.
Daily exercise is key to overall mental and physical health and helps elevate mood, increase focus and is vital for those with ADD/ADHD.
Get an exercise buddy or group who will support you and you them...even nag each other to make time for exercise.
Complex exercise tends to be more stimulating and interesting so those are the best for those with ADD /ADHD to participate. (i.e. raquetball, martial arts, and other sports with many levels of complexity and mastery that offer many ways to constantly learn and improve.)
With the guidance of an expert, you may be able to get accomodations at work. It is best to enroll the services of an expert before beginning this conversation at work.
It is probably best NOT to disclose your ADD at work before enrolling the help of an expert.
Here are some summary points from some of my notes from participating in the conference:
Some important reminders that the speakers addressed at the conference included the importance to those with ADD/ADHD challenges (and others who share those challenges) to cover some basics:
Get and stay connected socially with those who love, support and accept you for who you are and who encourage and support you.
Get work where you feel productive and appreciated.
Have constant structured support to stay focused on short term and long term goals.
Use systems and technology to help you get and stay organized.
Bring and keep fun in your life and plan for and schedule fun and social time so you support yourself in having it.
Some new things:
Research shows that having a trained and specialized ADD/ADHD Coach in your life helps you feel happier, stay focused and be more productive.
Daily exercise is key to overall mental and physical health and helps elevate mood, increase focus and is vital for those with ADD/ADHD.
Get an exercise buddy or group who will support you and you them...even nag each other to make time for exercise.
Complex exercise tends to be more stimulating and interesting so those are the best for those with ADD /ADHD to participate. (i.e. raquetball, martial arts, and other sports with many levels of complexity and mastery that offer many ways to constantly learn and improve.)
With the guidance of an expert, you may be able to get accomodations at work. It is best to enroll the services of an expert before beginning this conversation at work.
It is probably best NOT to disclose your ADD at work before enrolling the help of an expert.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Strengths: How much time do you spend with your strengths?
Strengths – It is so important to spend time using and developing our strengths….when I speak about strengths I realize there are at least two key categories of strengths. There are things we are good at, which may or may not come easily, and which we may or may not enjoy using. Today I am talking about those things we do really well and we enjoy doing them…whether it is important as to how easy or difficult it is for us to use them does not matter to me at the moment. If we enjoy them and are good at them, then, in my opinion, we should spend the majority of our time getting even better at them. Also, as much as possible, we should spend the minimum amount of time we can on the things we do not enjoy and/or do not do well (at least so much as we are still be effective and successful in life). Spending as much the majority of our time, energy and focus doing things that we do well and enjoy is a worthy and important goal in life.
Suggestion….for a week set a timer to go off once an hour, when the timer goes off, write down a quick estimate of what amount of your hour you spent on using the skills you love to use and do that for your waking day, each day for a week. If your weeks vary a lot, you may want to extend this discovery process for a month. Then come back to this blog, and we will explore what to do with the information you discover. Send me an email with what you find.
Happy Hunting.
Robb
Strengths – It is so important to spend time using and developing our strengths….when I speak about strengths I realize there are at least two key categories of strengths. There are things we are good at, which may or may not come easily, and which we may or may not enjoy using. Today I am talking about those things we do really well and we enjoy doing them…whether it is important as to how easy or difficult it is for us to use them does not matter to me at the moment. If we enjoy them and are good at them, then, in my opinion, we should spend the majority of our time getting even better at them. Also, as much as possible, we should spend the minimum amount of time we can on the things we do not enjoy and/or do not do well (at least so much as we are still be effective and successful in life). Spending as much the majority of our time, energy and focus doing things that we do well and enjoy is a worthy and important goal in life.
Suggestion….for a week set a timer to go off once an hour, when the timer goes off, write down a quick estimate of what amount of your hour you spent on using the skills you love to use and do that for your waking day, each day for a week. If your weeks vary a lot, you may want to extend this discovery process for a month. Then come back to this blog, and we will explore what to do with the information you discover. Send me an email with what you find.
Happy Hunting.
Robb
Friday, June 20, 2008
ADHD ADD at the workplace
The qualities and traits of ADHD can show up as positives and/or negatives in the workplace. Many times those traits that are showing up as negative or perceived by others as negative can be turned around in short order. Sometimes an advisor, advocate, strategists or support staff is needed to make the transition as successful as possible. These changes can result in job security, promotions, raises and/or new and bigger opportunities. In my experience, some of the clients I have worked with have gone from being an employee at jeopardy of losing his or her job, or an executive at risk, too being seen and recognized as a vital link to the success of the business or organization. For example, one architect with key marketing and sales responsibilities for a key architectural firm went from a place of the partners discussing his possible dismissal to a place where the partners were discussing how they could pay him more incentives and praising him for firm wide record breaking performance. The solutions involved many parts and stages, some of the things I advocated for and worked with the employee and firm to create included reframing the context within which his role was viewed and thereby defined, comparing the support staff and administrative functions in place in his areas of responsibilities compared to those of similar levels in other parts of the firm, gathering broader and deeper financial data to make a sound argument for the changes that needed to be made that were not only justified, but demanded by the firm's own button line history. After the client and I had his actions and plan in place and a clear plan of attack in place, all of our key requests were granted and the implementations were successful to the benefit of the employee, as well as, the entire firm.
If someone is concerned about job security, finding and keeping the right joy, keeping a position in the company they are in (at least until something better is secured), it is important to take both a big picture perspective as well as identifying the details. Top performance is in the best interests of the employee as well as the entire organization. If you or someone you know are concerned about such things, you may begin by speaking about (and writing down) the plus and minus sides of the big picture: What is working and what is not working? What is a true problem and what is a perception problem?
Then, proceed to get to smaller and smaller details until you have a full list of what is working and what is not working. (alternatively, one can start with the details and build up or start with the big picture and get more specific). At that point, put the list down for a period of time and come back to it several times with fresh eyes. Then, it is time to engage in productive conversation with a trusted friend, family member or professional who can help.
I invite you to tell me about your current or past experiences with ADHD at the workplace.
If someone is concerned about job security, finding and keeping the right joy, keeping a position in the company they are in (at least until something better is secured), it is important to take both a big picture perspective as well as identifying the details. Top performance is in the best interests of the employee as well as the entire organization. If you or someone you know are concerned about such things, you may begin by speaking about (and writing down) the plus and minus sides of the big picture: What is working and what is not working? What is a true problem and what is a perception problem?
Then, proceed to get to smaller and smaller details until you have a full list of what is working and what is not working. (alternatively, one can start with the details and build up or start with the big picture and get more specific). At that point, put the list down for a period of time and come back to it several times with fresh eyes. Then, it is time to engage in productive conversation with a trusted friend, family member or professional who can help.
I invite you to tell me about your current or past experiences with ADHD at the workplace.
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